Thank you for your heartfelt question. As a man myself I know exactly what it feels like when we feel we can’t satisfy our partner.  The good news is that most men can overcome this shortfall, and rebuild their confidence with the right premature ejaculation treatment.  

Did you know statistics indicate that between 30 and 40% of men experience a degree of premature ejaculation at some point in their life? You are not alone! It’s not an uncommon occurrence and can be treated and managed with a multi-focused solution based on individual needs. 

What is normal for men when it comes to making love or having wild rockstar sex? I found an interesting study that suggested men in certain countries last longer than in other countries! This leads me to believe that there are a lot of different factors at play in how we perform during sex.

Most men want a magic number on how long they should last. I generally ask my clients about their own time-based performance, and many have a vague idea and rarely know how long they last. Trust me, most men tend to exaggerate their sexual prowess in the bedroom when talking about it to other mates! The truth is that the average session of sex does not last as long as most people think.

It is important to not compare yourself to what you hear, as this causes anxiety and emotional stress. 

Did you know not all women require marathon sex? In fact, a lot of women are happy with the duration and can feel completely satisfied if there are other positive factors, such as prolonged foreplay and emotional connection.

What is premature ejaculation anyway? 

Let’s talk about some of the challenges before exploring premature ejaculation solutions.

Premature ejaculation happens when individuals ejaculate before their partner would like. It can happen before or shortly after penetration.   An individual who has an orgasm and ejaculates before they desire to will lose their erection and usually not be able to continue with intercourse. This may result in their partner feeling unsatisfied and leave the individual feeling frustrated and embarrassed. If it continues, it can create mental and emotional stress and a lack of sexual confidence.  In the long run, it may even damage relationships with intimate partners.

What causes premature ejaculation?

A combination of both physical and emotional factors can lead to premature ejaculation. The penis could be naturally sensitive and or experience too much excitement prior to intercourse.  One could also be nervous or uncomfortable with a new partner.  Other factors such as depression, hyperthyroidism, enlarged, prostate, anxiety, and stress can also lead to it.  

A noteworthy mention is that porn may play a pivotal role in conditioning an individual’s body to premature ejaculate. Men generally masturbate to porn. As a result, they are conditioning the nervous system to ejaculate based on their masturbation habits which are normally hard and fast. There could be psychological issues as well such as anxiety, low self-esteem, and other related issues. 

Premature Ejaculation Solutions

Premature ejaculation treatments can be quite successful. Normally a change in behavior and mindset on how one approaches sex can help ease the symptoms and work to prevent it. 

As a Somatic Sexologist working here in South Africa, I help men with P.E. (premature ejaculation ) by creating a tailored solution based on their emotional and physical assessments.  Somatics means how we perceive our bodies within.  We learn to let go of how things should be and learn to just notice and accept what’s going on at the time. This helps create a mind-body connection which will reduce the anxiety and pressure of performing.  This internal sense of self creates a  base to teach our nervous system to relax as we become more aroused. Our nervous system is responsible for the ejaculatory response.  The more we can relax in our arousal, the more we can delay the ejaculation response